Ep 23: Jealousy, Envy, and Everything Swingers Feel but Don’t Say

In this honest and insightful episode, your hosts dive deep into two of the most complex emotions in swinging: jealousy and envy. While often confused, these two feelings are very different—and each can surface in powerful and unexpected ways within the lifestyle.

Your hosts share openly about their personal experiences, exploring how these emotions have affected their relationships, and where their individual insecurities have surfaced. They also reflect on how age, experience, and their unique relationship dynamics influence the way they process their feelings. It’s a more serious conversation, grounded in transparency, vulnerability, and real growth. This one promises to inspire deep conversations with your own partner.

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(00:00:00) Defining Jealousy and Envy

(00:02:24) Fear of losing your partner 

(00:04:03) Good luck finding somebody better

(00:05:14) Boundaries were crossed

(00:07:27) Why are we in this lifestyle?

(00:08:20) Articulating your emotions is challenging

(00:09:52) Questioning your own feelings

(00:10:18) Jealousy, envy, insecurities

(00:11:48) You can’t stuff the feelings down

(00:16:15) Is jealousy and envy necessary to experience the thrill?

(00:19:03) In the lifestyle…we flirt back

(00:21:15) He used to be my little secret

(00:23:31) Sharing the intimacy of your spouse and relationship

(00:26:23) Jealousy could creep in

(00:30:16) Is our subconscious controlling our outcome?

(00:32:47) Don’t fix it if it ain’t broke

(00:33:09) Envy can show up in all kinds of unexpected place

(00:36:32) I was envious of his ‘8’ experience because I had a ‘2’

(00:38:49) Being envious of your partner’s personality

(00:40:48) ‘Helping’ doesn’t help

(00:42:37) You don’t do that with me anymore…don’t do it with her

(00:43:59) Feeling envious of other couples

(00:47:25) Jealousy can create emotional and physical pain

(00:49:44) Will jealousy always be a part of the lifestyle?

(00:52:29) Is jealousy a positive or negative thing?

(00:56:45) This is almost the definition OF the lifestyle

(00:57:53) Parting advice

(01:00:04) Listen to episode 11: Vaginas if you need a good laugh

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